Being Jealous,not fun at all..

so sleepy..so sleepy and eyes going to close..zzz..wanna blog last night but internet connection made it fail.so this morning rushing to college and tell two lessons no class until afternoon 2pm..so why am I so stupidly not enough sleep for the whole midnight rushing up assignments and waking up so that dumb early?!

anyhoos,reach college and now blogging..couldnt sleep until later afternoon cause its hard to sleep in class with the hard chair and not comfortable feeling.

Thanks to dad yesterday night buying "oh jian" Oyster with fried egg and Bee Hun for the supper to hold me from sleeping and now I know..now and next and every semester break..I'm going to workout for the abs and butt! Its only 7 weeks block and now I'm puffed.Due to the assignments and blammo to everything..I know its time..its time to work out for the body,mind and soul..so I wish more break time for me to rest and rest so I could dream something sweet but not parasites. :D

I'm not talking to the second brother these few days,ok..I do not want to blame anything on anyone..Is my attitude problem..I know my sucks to my brothers..I dont want to care what brother do to me or either are they bothering what am I doing or not..I DONT CARE..but..yesterday I finally realised,I realised that I was so childish showing tempo in front of sugar mama and honey papa..Its all because of jealousy..How I jealous to my brother..Sir Gerald told before" Its alright to be envy but not jealous "

I think I'm being pampered too long,I told myself that I'm not jealous and hold my feelings that wouldnt want to show out..But in reality I am and I was !
I know I shouldnt due to some problem but..Oh..you know how the feels when you feel that your parents do not care for you..somehow sometimes I feel that I irritates Momma too;how I wanted this and that..not satisf[y to this and that.What should I do? I'm borned I couldnt reverse back the time..Ee..I always hope to reverse the time but the truth is..I have to face the truth.I'm so tired and sick being a jealousololololo !!

The eldest one went to perhentian yesterday and sudden my mood was so happy..that is the time I realised I'm being jealousy to that fella.But I controlled and thought spending time with Momma for dinner cause dad have to be in work and some meeting..but when we was thinking what's for dinner mom told have to be fast cause she has to rush back to do something for the eldo bro.How I wish to throw tentarum on that moment.Happy mood went off and ended up we loitered in night market in Taman Chi Liung and my dinner was packed in the same mamak again..4 days I have been eating the food there..tosai bawang,chappati,idli,nasi lemak and chutney and tempting dhall over there and you know you know you know I will sapu all the food like a dinosaur and finally stressed always take the advantage of the chance to bring me down.How to power my mind is the main thing now I hope I can cope up and think wisely and stop being so childish.

I'm gonna lock myself in the garden and kitchen for this wesak,weekend,and next week until all the formatives over and I can enjoy my cwit cwit one week sem break and workout for the body.I'm serious this time..I will still enjoy eating but have to be more hardworking in working out :D

Ahaha..I want to shop the malls and somehow I wish the guy next door come to Malaysia so I could meet him.Haha..the cough syrup lover! Always hoping to cough so that he could drink..how funny and dangerous he are..haha! and Mamamia I lost his phone number cause I sent phone to repair and thank you they formatted so cry for that :P

I miss Baby Raymond so muchie!
Oh..not only the daughter have to workout..haha..bought a lovely cheese cake for dad and he ask me " dear you think your father not fat enough " ahaha..Dad..You will always be that fit and strong in my heart :D..you and mom always in my heart thou i'm stubborn not to hear the advices sometime or you might think I always do that so..well..I LOVE YOU BOTH ALWAYS

- xoxoxoxoxoxoxo - <3